The Flavor Meridian
I have made a startling discovery. I am being ripped off by my local pizzeria! It costs $2.00 per slice of
regular cheese. Of course, it will always be better than school "restaurant style" pizza. But anyway, here's the
story:
I discovered a line where the flavor of the pizza diminishes, and could technically be defined as where the
crust begins. The Flavor Meridian.

When the pizza is made, sauce is
first spread, and cheese is then
applied. Well, the flavor meridian
is where the sauce ends, but the
cheese continues. Then, the
cheese, without lubrication from
the sauce, becomes dry and
flavorless. When the pizza
originally hits your tongue, it
engulfs you with a certain flavor
that lasts until you eat up to the
flavor meridian. The flavor
meridian is generally where the
bubbles form. Bubbles have no
flavor, and nobody knows what
inside. They form from the lack of
sauce, which reduces heat
dissipation, and through
reverse-osmosis, makes the crust
bubble. But anyway, once you eat
past this flavor meridian, all you
taste is crust. And if you don't like
crust, don't eat past there.
So, as a rule of thumb, only eat up to the sauce, and avoid the bubbles. Here are some more guidelines:
- Don't accept pizzas where bubbles form closer to the center.
- "Extra Cheese" menu items will make it worse.
- Pepperoni reduces bubbles and its oil lubricates the flavor meridian.
- Chicken can dry up the pizza.
- pop all bubbles before consuming; they obstruct your view and hinder folding.